Will God forgive me?

        The above question is often asked by Christians, you’re certain that what you’ve just done is so atrocious (which most likely it is) that God can’t forgive you..yes, you know he’s so merciful, yes you know he’s filled with so much love but this; what I have just done, even I can’t stand myself. We are filled with so much of these thoughts while on our condemnation seat with our heads rested on the thighs of disgust. This definitely has been me in this past few days and while I was seated or most likely laid down thinking how did I get here? Where did I start falling? I read something one of my favorite writers & also one of my most favorite persons wrote to me, this helped me so much I had to share. Stay inspired as you read below.

GOD’S NOT DISGUSTED BY YOUR POOP

The worst feeling we get is the feeling of disgust in ourselves when we sin against God. We hate ourselves, punch ourselves, torture ourselves and feel like shit about who we have become. We don’t feel worthy of love from God, anyone or even ourselves. We feel disqualified!

This feeling is common and disempowering because it makes us crucify ourselves before we are judged. The truth be told, God is seldom after throwing stones of judgment at us. God is a merciful God. He made provision for the forgiveness of our sins because He knew we would need it every once in a while. God is never the first to cast the stone of judgment at us. Each time we fall short of His demands, we hurt him but He looks past it and extends His arms of love towards us.

In Romans 5:8, We see that Christ didn’t die for us before we were sinners. He died for us while we were sinners. It means we qualified for God’s greatest display of love as mere sinners. We were worth dying for even in our most miserable and detestable state as humans.

The relationship between God and man is as a mother and her infant child who very often poops on himself. Notice that when a child poops on himself, he is disgusted in himself. He begins to cry a certain cry for attention that the mum seems to understand. If he is able to walk, he walks with his legs far apart because he is disgusted and wouldn’t want to smear the poop all over himself.

However, on the other hand, when the mother notices him and picks him up, she may spank him a bit, but she ultimately never shows disgust in her child because of what he has done. She cleans him up and releases him to play again.

Similarly, we also like infants, smear ourselves with the poop of our sin and are disgusted at ourselves. But as we run to God, He picks us up, changes our diapers and teaches us to use the toilets for next time.

In John 8:1-11, there is a woman who was caught in the act of adultery and brought before Jesus for to be stoned to death. She had pooped on herself by sinning. The congregation felt like she deserved it, she also felt like she deserved it but to the surprise of everyone, Jesus picked her up, forgave her of her sins and asked her to go and sin no more. What a motherly God we serve!

Also in Luke 15:11-32, the prodigal son although smeared with the poop of riotous living and rebellion, still got a big embrace from the father, coated with a kiss of acceptance, a gold ring signifying royalty and a change of raiment. What a fatherly God we serve!

Many times, we are quick to cast the first stone at our self. We feel so terrible about ourselves that we begin to avoid God like Adam when in fact we should be running to him. We are made to feel like we are not worthy of love. We avoid the church because we feel unworthy of His presence.

When we fall into sin, God wants to cuddle us so tight just so His righteousness can rob off on us. As a car is taken to the mechanics for repair when it malfunctions, or as a person is taken to the hospital when sick, we must run to our God when we feel a life malfunction. God has a change of diaper reserved for every time we poop!

writer: Tega Awhinawhi 

instagram: Teygah0001

facebook: Awhinawhi Joseph Oghenetega

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